Profile
	I am passionate, curious, and love a challenge. The career world, and the world in general, disappoints me a little, sometimes a lot. I’m slowly loosing my memory as well as interest in communicating with the outside world, but I’m sure that if I try hard I can reasonably get along with at least one or two people on your team.
Education
		Bachelor of Arts, Philosophy, McMaster University //Honours Bachelor of Commerce, McMaster University //Ontario Secondary School Diploma, Lord Elgin High School
Work
		Royal Bank - Customer Service Representative As did the other employees, I performed various financial transactions quickly and accurately, striving and getting very close to the performance level of an automated banking machine (ATM). Perfected the greeting procedure and followed it with every person who came in, discriminating for no one. The Shoe Club- Assistant Manager and Sales Representative I manipulated people into buying shoes that they didn’t need, and won various awards for making the company a lot of money. Took pleasure in arranging shoes on a shelf. Dalton Timmis Insurance - Technical Service Representative I copy and pasted things from one database into another. The data was about motorcycle insurance but it could have just as well been about pedophilia, I didn’t pay too much attention. Spotless Drycleaners - Customer Service Representative I sat and wrote poems until people came by to drop off or pick up their dry cleaning, at which point I stopped and either got it for them from the alphabetically arranged hangers or put their items into a big un-alphabetical pile of dirty clothes.
Other experience:
		Perspectives, McMaster Student Club, 2004-2007: Co-founder, Co-president, and Co-editor: Found out about how evil McMaster is and tried to tell people. Made a magazine, I think some people read it! Insaaniyat (trans. Humanity), Community Organization, 2003: Helped organize events to try to build a school in India. Humanities Student Research Ethics Committee, McMaster University, 2006-present: One of two token students on the board. I examined research proposals involving human subjects and provided subjective written and verbal assessment regarding the ethics of proposed student research in humanities; my personal opinions were then used as representative of the McMaster student population. Gold Key National Honours Society, McMaster University Chapter, 2003-present: Paid $80 to make my parents happy that I belong somewhere. McMaster Russian Association, 2002-present: I was never actually a part of this. Note Taker, McMaster, 2005-06: Tried to write neatly. Attended a couple of Student Representative Assembly Meetings, McMaster University, 2005-2007: Informed the McMaster student union about the fact that they are not doing their job, to which they responded by not doing their job. Painted mural for school gymnasium, Guelph Collegiate Vocational Institute (High School), 2002. Students4Satan: Helped to improve Satan’s reputation among the McMaster community.
Languages
		English, fluent, but I don’t like it very much. Russian, fluent. Ukrainian, needs a day or two of refreshing but still good. French, trying to learn.
References
		I’ll ask some people I like, if you want.

Let the bidding begin!